thebestpersonherelovesbucky:

so-super-fucking-skinny:

twinque:

ordering pizza

this is what i do everytime and then last time i did it i got a call from an old chinese man saying “i’m the only one working is it ok if i come”

he got a $20 tip

#okay but imagine your otp ((via @carpebucky))

“Tony, no, I’m not going.”

Steve is sitting on the counter. He won’t go. He won’t. The special instructions stated “send your cutest delivery boy” and that’s not him. Not with his lanky limbs and skinny body and mess of blonde hair that refused to fall neatly. 

“Yeah, you are though,” Tony insists. “The instructions specifically say the cutest and that’s you.”

He’s dumping the bag next to Steve as if Steve’s not said one word of protest.

“Tony–”

“Sam!” Tony shouts. “Tell Steve he’s gotta go!”

“You gotta go, Steve!” Sam yells back from the kitchen. Not missing a beat. “I got the hot, Tony’s got the sexy, and you got the cute. Now get your cute butt out the door.”

Knowing it’s a lost cause, Steve grumbles something about hating the both of them and scoops the order up. He’s gonna kill them, he will. One day. Revenge will be sweet. 

Steve makes it there under the thirty minutes or less policy and is too annoyed at his friends to consider hesitating. When the door opens though, his stomach twists. Can this guy be any more gorgeous? Not even if he tried. Not with those muscles and fuzzy stubble and that pretty hair pulled back in a messy bun. Those piercing steel eyes alone are enough to make Steve blush, and he finds himself vomiting an apology. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he says. “I was the only one available.”

The guy in the door lets out a quiet chuckle. 

“I was only kidding,” he replies. “I didn’t really expect the cutest boy. But I sure am glad they sent him.” The guy blushes as soon as he says it. Steve’s face gets even redder. Can this guy be real? “Sorry. That was… uh, how much do I owe you?”

“Uh…” Steve rattles off the amount and the guy hands him that plus a twenty dollar bill. “Oh, um, I think you made a mistake.”

“No, it’s not a mistake.” His eyes trail over Steve as if looking for something. He blushes again. 

“Well, enjoy your food.”

“Oh.” He glances at the food in his hands like he’s forgotten about it. “Yeah. Thanks. Um, have a nice night.”

Steve nods and turns and tries not to run like crazy to get out of there and bury himself under a rock for a few years. Which is not necessary. Since the next night another order comes in from the same address with new instructions. 

Only send if the cute delivery guy is working again. He can ask for Bucky.